Today, Jessica speaks to us about how Jesus found her at a rave and the pain she had been carrying which had taken her to that place, and learning to rest in God and ‘cease striving.’ Powerfully insightful.
Inspiring biblical passage of the moment: “When I heard these things, I sat down and wept. For some days I mourned and fasted and prayed before the God of heaven.” Nehemiah 1:4
This is inspiring because I believe this was God intention for how we should be using our time, every hour, and every day. We don’t because of this world we live in that’s created a structure of minutes and hours, schedules, to-do lists, and more. I feel because we lack the ‘time’ and care to mourn and truly lament well with God, we never seek true healing.
This is why so many are in therapy or counseling because they’re stuck in areas they can’t get out of without the Lord’s counsel. This is inspiring for me because I see how a faithful man of God first ‘sits down’ before anything else as He comes before the Lord. He ceases to strive, and I admire Nehemiah’s obedience to the Lord.
“I feel because we lack the ‘time’ and care to mourn and truly lament well with God, we never seek true healing.”
Spiritual growth focus at the moment: Learning how to fully rest and receive the Lord’s abundant provision over my life. It’s very uncomfortable because I am used to working and earning everything, or so I believe, but I feel the Lord just wants me to receive and praise Him in this season.
Profession: Social media for non-profits, a commercial actress (financially amazing but true job is to evangelize on television sets backstage), Airbnb my condo, as a side hustle.
A one sentence bio of yourself: Jesus is my Savior and not my religion. I came to Him through relationship and not through a set of laws or rules, shame or guilt, nor force or coercion. I chose Him on my own, and my life flipped a 180 into the freedom of Jesus.
“I chose Him on my own, and my life flipped a 180 into the freedom of Jesus.”
When did you first encounter God and how did you encounter Him? At a rave, as I was hardcore into drug use. I felt a Holy Spirit conviction that I can identify now was Him. After years of abusing drugs, smoking, and raving the spirit fell upon me making me instantly disgusted at the smell of my cigarette and instantly sober physically, mentally, and spiritually. I began looking around at the people for the first time and my heart broke. I saw such lost souls search for a savior and an escape from their existence that I knew I didn’t belong there. I felt the Lord put on my heart that He knows I’ve been running from Him, He knows I’m angry with Him, I’m hurt from my mother’s death just a few years back, and in spite of my rebellion, He loves me.
I felt Him say that He forgives me, and He wants me to come to Him. He wanted me to leave the rave, and soon, I wanted to leave myself. He changed my heart in that moment to long for His presence in my life. I didn’t physically stop my addictions until a year later, but He was recklessly breaking down the walls of my heart that entire time. Of course, Jesus won, and here I am today walking in the spirit.
“I felt the Lord put on my heart that He knows I’ve been running from Him, He knows I’m angry with Him, I’m hurt from my mother’s death just a few years back, and in spite of my rebellion, He loves me.”
What has helped you grow spiritually in this season? My community and best friends who are like my human diary. They can retell where I was 5 years ago until today and build me up with encouragement that the Lord is moving, whether I see it or not.
Just read/currently reading (and what has it taught you?): “Cease striving and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.” Psalm 46:10
‘Cease striving’ stuck out to me to simply stop trying. Let go, and let the Lord into all my spaces to do a mighty work only He can do.
Top three essentials: Bible, phone, a snack.
How did God speak to you recently? Sometimes, exercise self-control to not speak. *laughs* If I’m talking, I can’t hear the spirit in His still quiet voice, and I can’t bring myself low for Him to give me the words and ears to listen to my brother or sister share what’s on their hearts.
Hobby: Working out at the gym, beach volleyball, hiking.
Top three practical tips for staying spiritually strong: Rest, pray, eat.
Favorite person in scripture? Isaiah.
What do you want people to learn about God when they look at you? That He is a God of freedom and mercy, not a God of rules, oppression, and judgement to those who love Him. In Christ, His riches are unsearchable, and He is mighty to save.
Favorite season? Fall.
Favorite holiday? Thanksgiving because it’s like Christmas without the distractions of all the presents.
A dream you have? To have a talk show like, “The Talk” but with a panel of Christian women talking about the struggles on every day walking with the Lord.
A special tradition you and your family engage in or keep: Grandparents anniversaries in Taiwan, we all fly back to celebrate them.
Question you will ask when you get to heaven? Where my mother?
Thing you want to raise awareness about: Jesus is not about religion, but saving. AND… men who love the Lord will love us women the same way He loves us.
“Jesus is not about religion, but saving.”
What do you usually do before 9 a.m.? Drink water, work from my phone as I work from home.
What is on your nightstand? Picture of my parents, a lamp, a cup of water, my ‘Jesus’ necklace, candles, a mirror, and lots of books.
Define Christianity in a sentence: Freedom from this fallen and broken world and new life, moving glory to glory, in victory with Christ.
For more Jessica:
Until next time, keep witnessing!